Thursday, April 30, 2009

Feeling It Real

"Trouble is part of your life, and if you don't share it, you don't give the person who loves you a chance to love you enough."- Dinah Shore

First, I wish to apologize for my absence as of late. Things have been rather topsy-turvy and I will be honest, I have found myself wondering whether I have been coming or going. To explain; a few weeks ago I received the sad news that my ex-hubby was diagnosed with cancer. With that news came the reality that we had to share that with our 14 year old son. Damn, if that fine young man didn't handle the news better than his mother. He was positive, optimistic, and rather hopeful while I (out of his view) fell to pieces.

Now, for those of you who know me really well, you also know that I usually try to put a positive spin on everything. Not as a form of denial, but because I truly do believe that out of every difficult situation comes some good, some form of learning that makes us better people. (A little secret: I also have a bad habit of not wanting to burden anyone with my troubles, and what's worse, I somehow got it my head that I have to present a "I've got it all together" front even if inside I'm knotted and not feeling at my best). What I didn't realize is that by holding things in, by "acting" as if I have it all together, and by not asking for support I have been...

- Making others feel inadequate
- Not allowing anyone to step up and support me, and share their gifts
- Inadvertently being deceptive (not consciously, really)
- Stifling my own growth
- Not letting go of the feelings

Old habits die hard, let me tell you. Regardless, I have made a new promise to myself, to feel it real. It's OK to let others know that I'm in pain and need a bit of support. I have tried it and people have been wonderful. The support has been amazing and as a matter of fact, others have shared their feelings as well. I've even had a few folks thank me for being so honest and allowing them to render support. So far no one has said, "Hey, Pam...get your shit together, will ya?" OR "Would you stop feeling sorry for yourself?"

So dear ones, if you take away anything from this post, I hope it's the message to feel it real and let others step up to support and share their gifts too! Love to all of you and I will look forward to connecting with you again soon.

Posted by Pam at 7:15:47 PM in Not Just Talk (85) | Comments (4) | Permalink

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Never Forget Your Worth

A dear, wonderful person who I love and respect a lot sent the following to me. Frankly, it couldn't have come at a better time. We all need a reminder (from time-to-time) that we are worth a hell of a lot. I pass this along to all of you (men and women alike) so that you will hopefully be reminded that your worth is priceless!

One Flaw In Women

Women have strengths that amaze men. They bear hardships and they carry burdens, but they hold happiness, love and joy.

They smile when they want to scream. They sing when they want to cry. They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous. They fight for what they believe in. They stand up to injustice.

They don't take "no" for an answer when they believe there is a better solution.

They go without so their family can have. They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.

They love unconditionally. They cry when their children excel and cheer when their friends get awards.

They are happy when they hear about a birth or a wedding. Their hearts break when a friend dies. They grieve at the loss of a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left. They know that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart.

Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors.

They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you to show how much they care about you.

The heart of a woman is what makes the world keep turning.

They bring joy, hope and love. They have compassion and ideas. They give moral support to their family and friends.

Women have vital things to say and everything to give.

HOWEVER, IF THERE IS ONE FLAW IN WOMEN, IT IS THAT THEY FORGET THEIR WORTH.

Posted by Pam at 3:27:52 PM in Not Just Talk (85) | Comments (0) | Permalink

Tuesday, April 07, 2009

Help! I've Fallen...

...off the face of the earth! No, I haven't really. I've just been taking some much needed "me" time to reflect, tweek, unearth, gain clarity, not to mention have a little fun. Besides, I made a commitment when I started this blog that I wasn't going to post just for the sake of posting. I was only going to post when I had something that was worthy of sharing. (No sense boring anyone with mind-numbing dribble, right? You all are busy and I respect and appreciate your time.)

During the past few weeks the following has bubbled to the surface:
  • I need to not forget to connect with the child-side of me. I am at my very best when I am able to recharge and have fun.
  • Speaking of recharging, not eating well or getting enough sleep stifles my creativity and does not support my best coaching
  • Stifled feelings only hinder my ability to fully be the best me I can be. Saying them outloud (to myself), writing about them, talking to a friend or family member have been great strategies for letting some feelings out into the light of day.
  • Being in my head (or in the land of ego) and over analyzing stops me from being in the flow. When I am not in the flow it is hard for me to fully come from my heart, where the important ideas, feelings, thoughts live.
  • I really like public speaking so I think I need to do more of that. Public speaking is not only fun, but it feeds my spirit.
  • I have dreams and aspirations, but if I'm not setting those dreams and aspirations into motion some way some how, all they are, are dreams and aspirations that never get to grow and become something cool.
So there you have it, my dear friends. As you can see I really didn't fall off the face of the earth, I just went inward for a bit! Have a wonderful rest of your week and I will look forward to connecting soon.

Posted by Pam at 9:47:41 PM in I AM... (9) | Comments (2) | Permalink