Oh, Just Deal With It!
Not too long ago I was having kind of a tough time so I turned to a friend for a bit of support. Rather than render support, my friend (bless her) proceeded to “jump my case” for what she felt was dismissive behavior. She let me know that my trying to see the bright side was not cool and was just a way of avoiding how I felt. She also let me know that I am being real when I am sitting in my own poop.
Not real? Avoidance? Whoa Nelly! That did not sit well with me and I honestly felt like I was being scolded.
You see, I used to bitch and moan A LOT! If something went wrong every body and their dog knew about it. I would feel sorry for myself for days on end – slinging poop at everyone and everything. What did that get me? NADA! ZIP! ZELCH! NOTHING! Well, no wait, that’s not entirely true; it got me deeper in my own poop and the stink spread to others. Ewwwwwwwwwwwww!
Today, when I am faced with an adverse situation I choose (yep, because I have a choice) to feel the feelings and then try to find the positive take away. Not because I am trying to dismiss the issue at hand, nor stuff it in the corner with the dust bunnies. I’m not. I’ve just found that I deal better that way -- I actually learn and move through the issue much faster.
The truth is, everyone has their own way of dealing with adversity and it’s important to respect a person’s process for processing. It also OK to sit in your own poop sandbox, but it’s not OK to sling poop at others for slinging sake. Remember, we are all unique individuals and that is a good thing. Which means we all deal with things differently – there is no cookie cutter way. If your process is working for you, if it helps you to move through a negative situation, then embrace it and use the hell out of it. I know I will.